Thursday, August 28th

What I ate today:

Breakfast:
Smoothie with blueberries, strawberries, yogurt, milk, and vitamins.
cheese string

Lunch:
Honey mustard chicken salad from Quizno's.

Dinner:
Homemade butter chicken, rice, subji.

Wednesday, August 27

What I ate:

Breakfast:
String Cheese

Lunch:
turkey breast
pickles
cucumber with light cream cheese
slice of colby cheese

Snack:
chips with cheese

Dinner:
1/4 rack of ribs, mashed potatoes, garden peas, some salt and pepper chicken wings

Dessert:
part of a peanut buster parfait from Dairy queen

How I felt: Did not eat well today! Did not have very much energy. Pain was higher today.  I think I just needed a bit more motivation.

Pain scale: 4/10

Tuesday, August 26

What I ate today:

Breakfast:
Steel cut oats with coconut sugar, raisins, and pumpkin pie spice.
Applesauce

Lunch:
half a grilled chicken breast
chicken wild rice
cucumber salad
broccoli salad
green beans

Snack:
tortilla chips and cheese
pudding (supplements)
small mocha coconut frappucino from Starbucks

Dinner:
stew (beef, potatoes, carrots, onion,(all from my garden) and celery)

snack:
applesauce (supplements)

How I felt:
I felt kind of tired today. Plus my kids were so hard to handle today for some reason, so I felt really on edge.  Still, more energy and motivation than a normal day.  I also ate some gluten today (gasp!).  Of all things, I ate 3 of Ainsley's cheese nips.  I've been able to turn down all gluten, but not that. Sigh.  I got Trev to take the box out of the house with him so I wouldn't eat more. :)

Pain scale:
3/10

Monday, August 25

Here's what I ate today:

Breakfast:
Steel cut oats with coconut sugar, pumpkin pie spice, and raisins
applesauce

Lunch:
Salad from Subway with lettuce, tomato, cucumber, onion, pickles, chicken, cheese, and honey mustard dressing

Snack:
scoop of hard ice cream from the Rolla store (felt sick after... possibly contained gluten?)
string cheese

Dinner:
Grilled chicken breast, steamed broccoli, green beans and carrots (from my garden), mashed potatoes (from my garden), cucumber (from my garden... lol) with a bit of sour cream.

Snack:
pudding and applesauce (yay, supplements)

How I feel:
Pretty good. I did get sickish after ice cream.  Had lots of energy!

The Supplements

A big part of my health journey is correcting the deficiencies I have.

Here's a list of what I'm taking and why:

Vitamin D3 Drops

Vitamin D aids in the development and maintenance of bones and teeth and plays an important      role in immune health.  Low levels of vitamin D are associated with increased risk of cardiovascular disease, high blood pressure, allergies, diabetes, multiple sclerosis, and some cancers. (And just a basic lack of energy!  Vitamin D also improves insulin sensitivity.  Almost all adults are at least a little vitamin D deficient, especially if you live up north, so start taking vitamin D if you aren't already!

Magnesium

Magnesium helps with protein synthesis, it is essential for muscle and nerve function, blood glucose (sugar) control, and blood pressure regulation.  It helps dilate your blood vessels which lowers blood pressure.  It helps those of us who have low quality sleep.  

N-Acetyl L-Cysteine and Alpha Lipoic Acid (NAC ALA)

NAC helps promote the excretion of mercury from the body, helps thin mucous, and increases insulin sensitivity.  ALA is a natural occurring amino acid (from flax, chia seeds, etc.) that improves blood sugar metabolism and helps with energy levels. 

Vitamin B12

Vitamin B12 is huge! This is the one that I have the lowest level of any patient they've had in the clinic.  Vitamin B12 deficiencies can get downright scary : http://www.health.harvard.edu/blog/vitamin-b12-deficiency-can-be-sneaky-harmful-201301105780Vitamin B12 is essential for building DNA and new red blood cells (which your body is always doing), regulating hormones, providing energy, and is essential for a healthy nervous system.  I'm not sure what may be causing my B12 shortage (most adults have a shortage, but mine is so extreme right now).  None of the normal reasons for having a B12 deficiency apply to me, except for one that I never thought might be a possibility: celiac disease.

Probiotic

Provides good gut bacteria, and helps support against occasional digestive upsets, especially if you are struggling with food allergies. 

Selenium

This one is the worst! Well, it tastes pretty awful.  But it is an antioxidant mineral (a yeast) that works with vitamin E to fight free radicals.  Not sure if I'm going to keep taking this one.  It is very hard not to gag.

ReadiSorb

This is a liquid called Glutathione that protects cells against free radicals that cause oxidation damage and removes toxins.  It also helps your body absorb the supplements you are taking.  And it is GROSS. But helpful.  But oh, so GROSS. 

Fulvic Liquid Minerals

Fulvic minerals help vitamins and minerals to be better absorbed into the cells of the body.  It is a plant based substance.  Just 5-10 drops a day is all you need.  It is pretty much tasteless- I just drop it in my smoothie, apple sauce, water, juice, etc.

Iodine

Iodine is essential for proper functioning of your thyroid, which regulates many hormones in your body.  My iodine levels are incredibly low.  Just 6 drops a day of iodine can make a huge difference.

Chromium

Chromium helps regulate blood sugar levels, as well as boost good cholesterol while lowering triglycerides in the blood. 

So... that's what I am taking right now.  I will probably be taking more supplements in the future when I am able to get my hands on chewable/liquid supplements.

Sunday, August 24

Today was an interesting day for me.

We had a special guest visiting: our Foursquare Unit Supervisor all the way from Whitehorse, Yukon.  Because we had a special guest, we also had a special dinner with him at a friends' house.  Later on this evening we helped put on a big barbecue for all of our church volunteers.

So, today was a lesson in how to eat when in situations beyond my control.

I have to say, our hosts for lunch were quite gracious when serving.  They pulled out chicken breast for me to eat when the hot dogs and sausages they were serving both had gluten.  So sweet.

Also, Sundays are incredibly busy for us, and I NEVER eat breakfast before church. It's just too hectic.  However, I know now that I absolutely need breakfast, and that's when I take the majority of my supplements.  As always, I was running late this morning, so I was so grateful that I could throw a smoothie together and take it out the door with me.

Here's how my eating went today:

Breakfast:
Smoothie with blueberries, strawberries, yogurt, milk, supplements.

Snack:
half a small french fries (eek... this has to stop!) from Mc Donald's

Lunch:
Half a grilled chicken breast, raw cucumber, carrots, and grape tomatoes, spinach salad with mandarin oranges, cucumber, almonds, and green onions with a poppyseed dressing, a handful of dill potato chips.

Dessert: Raspberry sauce with a dollop of whipped cream.

Dinner: broccoli salad, a small portion of potato salad, half a hamburger, tortilla chips with a side of cheese sauce, fudgesicle.  (I know... kind of a weird meal! We were getting rid of the excess food from our food booth, so it was a nice mishmash of a barbecue.  lol)

Snack: 3 potato skins with sour cream (also, yikes).

So, I've learned I need to make better snacking choices.  I've also learned that it is possible to eat in situations that I don't have control in and stay away from gluten.

I did have a bit of eggs today in my potato salad.  I'm feeling a wee bit sickly right now, so I think maybe I'm paying for it. :/

That's all for today! Good night!

E

Friday and Saturday, August 22-23.

This may be slightly boring for those of you who may be reading this, but I really want to use this to track multiple aspects of my journey, especially the food I eat.  Seeing that I'm trying to figure out a gluten-free egg-free life while at the same time eating a diet that discourages insulin resistance, I've got a lot of learning to do!

Friday:

Breakfast:
Steel cut oats with blueberries, coconut sugar, and cinnamon. A wee bit of 2%milk.

Snack:
String Cheese, pudding (I need the pudding for my supplements)

Lunch:
Grilled chicken breast

Snack:
Small fries from McDonald's

Dinner:
Gluten free spaghetti with garden fresh zucchini and tomatoes sautéed in olive oil with garlic and spices, grilled chicken breast.  Side salad with tomatoes and cucumber.

Snack: applesauce


Saturday:

Breakfast:
Smoothie with blueberries, strawberries, half a banana, yogurt, and milk (and a whole lot of vitamins). Applesauce

Lunch:
Grilled Chicken Breast with fresh garden peas, sautéed zucchini and mushrooms (in olive oil), two stalks of celery.

Snack:
string cheese
pudding

Dinner:
Grilled chicken breast (I'm seeing a trend) and baked potato (from my garden) with sour cream, cheese, green onions.

Snack:
A scoop of vanilla ice cream
2 slices watermelon
applesauce

The beginning of the road (for reals.... seriously.)

Trevor and I got referred to this incredible organization called Pure North by some friends of ours.  Don't worry, it's not a pyramid scheme or a get-rich-quick company.  It's basically a health initiative set up by a big company here in Canada for its own employees to focus more on preventative medicine versus crisis management.

Trev and I went  at the beginning of July and had our blood drawn, weight and measurements taken, health history, etc.  We met with an amazing Naturopath who we both connected with and felt so comfortable around.  We were given supplements based on our health histories and surveys we filled out about our current health situations.

Honestly, I struggled.  I was having a very difficult time with the supplements.  For those of you who don't know, I have a huge problem with my esophagus.  I have struggles with swallowing (dysphagia) and I constantly get stuff stuck in my throat.  Food, drink, medicine, you name it.

So every time a normal person would take a handful of pills and swallow, I chop mine into tiny pieces.  And for the capsules, I dump them into a smoothie, applesauce, or pudding.

That gets tiring after a while.  Especially when the powders taste SO BAD.

So, I kind of gave up.

Okay, I fully gave up. HA.

So this Thursday,  we were scheduled to meet the Naturopath again to go over our results.

Honestly, I didn't want to go.

All week I felt like crap.  I had been sleeping a lot, I was in a lot of pain, I felt this huge fog around me and a complete lack of motivation.  The last thing I wanted to do was go to Fort St. John (spit) (Corner Gas reference, anyone?) and hear about how nothing was really wrong with me- I was just fat and lazy, and if I could fix that, I'd be set.

We got into our van and the kids were whining and screaming that they didn't want to come.  I was grumpy, too.  At one point I looked at Trevor and said "Aidan sounds like what I feel like."

I think we could all agree that we weren't off to a good start.

We made it to FSJ, the kids were in a better mood (Ainsley napped on the way there and Aidan got a hamburger), and we were ready to take this on.

Honestly, I feel like my whole life changed while I was in there.

The nurse and naturopath listen to us.  Engaged us.  The staff played with our kids and gave them granola bars and colouring sheets (we were the last patients of the day, so there was only staff there).  We went through our results.

All of a sudden, the years of wondering what the heck was going on with my body started to come together.  For the first time, I wasn't blown off, shamed, or treated like I didn't know what I was talking about.

I have insulin resistance.  I figured for years that I had it.  I went to the doctor and asked for tests, and all we did was a glucose test.  So I would get a "No, you don't have diabetes!"  I know I don't have diabetes!

A simple blood test showed that my insulin levels were insanely high.

I have a low B12 level.  In fact, the naturopath said she had never seen any patient with a number as low as mine.  It was off the charts low.  B12 is essential in DNA building, the nervous system, pain management, and especially hormones.

I have a very low iodine level, which regulates the thyroid.  Hello, difficulty losing weight and problems with hormones and body temperature regulation!

(there are a few more things, but I'm trying not to bore you)

And the one that really blew my mind: I have a gluten allergy.

I'm a pretty competitive person.  So, if I'm going to be bad at something, I'd rather be THE WORST. You know?  I know, that makes no sense.

So, I got kind of a weird satisfaction when she told me I had the worst gluten allergy rating she's ever seen in a patient at the clinic.  Who knew?!?  I don't get upset stomach and such when I eat wheat.

But, I have chronic inflammation and head aches, problems swallowing (AHA!), brain fog, no energy, etc.  Isn't it nuts?  Those are all symptoms of gluten allergy.


I felt so... validated.  I'm not crazy.  There are some serious things going on with my body.

So, what's next?

Well, no gluten.  Or eggs. (Apparently I'm allergic to those as well- not as severe).

Insulin resistant diet- which means high levels of protein and veggies, low carbs, watch the glycemic index.  No fried foods, etc.

I'm taking all kinds of supplements.

No more pop. Yeah, that's happening!

I feel very settled and determined now.  I have been able to have confirmation from someone that I'm not crazy and have been empowered to change my life.

yes, I'd still love to lose 100 pounds.  But, I believe that will come with being healthy and whole for the first time that I can remember.

Gluten Free

I have never been a huge fan of bread or pasta.

My son can finish off an entire loaf of bread in one morning if left unattended long enough (ask me how I know).  My husband, well, he does a good job of restraining himself now, but we'll just say that my son comes by it honestly.

Now, I'm no animal.  I too can't resist a steamy, squishy loaf of freshly baked bread, but it isn't my choice indulgence.

I think that's one reason I chose to start my "transformation" by giving up wheat. I sure love my doughnuts, cakes, cookies and pies, but I've conquered my need to do a slow drive by of the Safeway bakery section when I'm picking up groceries.

I am a self-proclaimed sugar addict.  I think the first step is admitting you have a problem.

But I am not a craver of bread. When it comes to empty carbohydrates, it is not my poison of choice.

So far on this journey, I've done well not having any wheat.  I'll admit, a couple of times I may have been caught nibbling on my daughter's grilled cheese crusts (eew. gross. I don't even like crusts), and two days ago I ate a Timbit.

But overall, I haven't missed the wheat. Until last night, when I was having a rough day and the call was made to order pizza.  We went with Panago, because they have a gluten free crust (I feel obligated to tell you that the crust has traces of gluten, because it is made in the same kitchen as the regular crusts.  If you are celiac, or actually have a gluten allergy, probably not a good idea.  And now I feel like an idiot, because if you are celiac, you know way more about this than I do and should not take advice from me).

So, how was the pizza?  It was... meh.

My dear husband, in his continual exuberance, exclaimed that it is, in fact, the greatest pizza crust he has ever tasted.  Later he conceded that he may have overshot his original impression.

Here's my take:
There's something about this gluten free crust that made me feel like it was holding on for dear life.  It felt like some very well meaning, well organized crumbs that were bonded together by sheer goodwill, and at the moment they entered my mouth, their strength collapsed and they scattered like cockroaches do when you turn on a light.

Those poor souls. But, can you blame them?  It's like making paper mache with no glue (you do use glue with paper mache, right? I really haven't done it before.  I am starting to realize this post is making me seem very ill-informed).

They valiantly tried.

It wasn't horrible.

And the texture was at least one step above cardboard.

I think next time I'll just order a regular pizza and do what I usually do: eat all the cheese and leave the crust for my gluten-happy son.

How about you? Do you have a favorite gluten-free recipe?  If so, share it in the comments, or on my Facebook!

What Would be Different?

I'm about to have a conversation with a new Facebook friend of mine.  We scheduled it for 6:30 p.m. my time.  He lives in Pennsylvania, so it'll be 8:30 for him.  I haven't met him in person, but we've talked sparingly on the interwebs.

He and his wife have lost a ton of weight together, and have now made it their mission to help others lose weight, too.  I'm a little panicked, because I:
 1. hate talking on the phone
 2. hate talking to people I don't know.
 3. hate talking about the fact that I'm overweight.

This is going to be a hard phone call for me.

Last night, while we were scheduling our phone call, my friend asked me to think about something before our talk today.

He said:
"Until we talk I want you to think on something...if you woke up this morning healthy and at a healthy weight, how would today have been different for you?"

Sigh.

So much would be different.

Now, I don't have any grand illusions about how my life will be perfect if I reach a healthy weight. I know my problems don't diminish with my waist line.

But I do know some things will be different.

The more I thought about his question, the more I realized I could narrow all of it down to two different areas: shame and pain.

A lot of the areas I felt would be different involved physical pain. Stuff like I would sleep better, I would have my job, I would be able to play with my kids.

I know with my spinal issues I don't have a guarantee that I'll ever have my pain lessened. But it sure makes sense that losing weight would only help.

The other area I could see the greatest change (hopefully) is change. I beat myself up over being overweight more than I do anything else. I know a part of the reason I don't wear makeup hardly ever, never do my hair, etc. is because I don't think I deserve it.

I also avoid the doctor, flying, and going to lots of social events because I'm ashamed of myself. My biggest fear is that someone will draw attention to my weight problem.

I know that losing weight won't take away my shame, but my Healer will.

I've already taken the big step of addressing my weight issue with my friends and family on Facebook, and here on this blog. I have hope that things will change.

Smoothie Operator

Ah the smoothie.  The much vaulted drink of the health industry.  Multi million dollar corporations sell various powders to mix in your blender to lose excess weight.

I, on the other hand, tend to stick to stuff I have in my house.  I've tried various smoothie mixes, but alas, my sensitive gag reflex doesn't allow me.  I wish I weren't so "picky," but I physically cannot help myself.  What's the point of drinking a smoothie if I can't keep it down?

So, after playing around with various healthy ingredients, here's my go to recipe:

1/2 cup fat free greek yogurt.  (I've tried different flavors, including plain, but I'm most happy with either vanilla or strawberry)

2 TBSP of chia seeds.

2 TBSP of organic, extra virgin cold pressed coconut oil. (I LOVE coconut oil.  It adds a lovely flavor to the smoothie.  Plus it has a gazillion health benefits. I'm a bit of an emetophobe (Intense fear of throwing up), so knowing that coconut oil has anti-viral properties that fight nasty stomach viruses, I am in 100%).

At least 1 Cup raw spinach

1 cup of frozen fruit.  Always a type of berry (strawberry or blueberry), and usually one other fruit.  Sometimes I will add one mandarin orange in place of the other frozen fruit

A dash of cinnamon.  Yum.

For me, the key is to add ingredients that will make me feel satisfied and give me energy. That's why I add the chia seeds and greek yogurt.  I try to stay away from fruits with a really high sugar content. Also, I don't add any juice.  That's just extra unneeded sugar.  If you need to add moisture, consider almond milk or water.  I usually just use water.

For today's smoothie, I used frozen strawberries and a blend of mango, peaches, and strawberries.


What ingredients do you put in your smoothie?

Support

When I finally decided I was crazy enough to admit to the world (a.k.a. Facebook) that I really need to lose 100 pounds, I pushed the share button and held my breath.

I'm not sure what I was waiting for. I have pretty positive friends on Facebook.  Maybe it's because I've systematically blocked all of the negative ones.

Either way, I was completely overwhelmed at the result. Tons of likes and comments, private messages, invites for weight loss support groups... I couldn't believe it.  In the matter of three hours, I had over three hundred blog views.

So, thank you.  I honestly feel like this was the next big step in allowing myself to receive love just the way I am, without trying to fix everything first, or pretend like nothing was wrong.  I never hid from my friends and family that I needed to lose weight, but I pretended like my extra weight did not exist.

The thing is, I'm a pretty orderly person.  I like to have a system for everything.  Just ask my husband.    The dishes in the dishwasher go in a certain way.  I have a very specific way of preparing my grocery list that has multiple steps.  Pretty much everything I do follows a system. But you know what, it works! I am much more effective when I follow a system.

So, I have all of these supporters who have given me a commitment to support me along this journey, and I don't want to take that precious gift for granted.  How do I make sure I am making the best use of the support that's been offered to me?  Right now I feel pretty overwhelmed and scattered, but I want to be more centered.

If you have any ideas, let me know! I'd love to hear them.  Feel free to tell me in the comments or send me a private message on Facebook.

Day 1

Today is the day.  I am starting January with some simple goals so I don't get completely overwhelmed.  Every month I will add new goals.

This month's goal:

No Pop (soda, coke, sody pop, fizzy beverage, soft drink, bone decayer, whatever you call it.)
No Wheat

Work out at least 2 times a week.

I'm also going to try incorporating more vegetables, limiting sugar and starches overall, etc.  But, those three are my concrete goals for the month of January.

I'll let you know how it's going!